Rocko's Modern Life, Or Not
by MWolfL
Summary: Rocko, severely needing extra cash, decides to rent out his spare room. A woman named Claire moves in and becomes his friend. But when secrets about their families are revealed, this puts Rocko's life in danger! Can Rocko survive? RockoXOC
1. Rocko Rents Out

Well, sad to say life hadn't changed much for poor Rocko. He still was unjustly mistreated by various members of O-Town and still low on cash. One year it got so bad that he decided to do something about it.

"Oh Spunky, my job at the comic book store just doesn't pay enough." Rocko said sadly, looking for a better paying job in the classifieds. "And if I don't get a better job soon, we might get kicked out of our home."

Spunky, whimpering, just looked at his empty dog food bowl. In order to cut back Rocko stuck to having just two small meals a day, while Spunky only got one meal a day.

"Great, there's nothing better." Rocko frowned, tossing the newspaper to the other end of the kitchen table. "If I don't think of something soon, I'll have to end up shopping for a cardboard box to live in. Hey, wait a minute!"

Rocko ran upstairs until he reached the spare bedroom. The spare bedroom could also be called a bare bedroom, as it only had a bed and dresser in it.

"Of course, I can rent out this bedroom, maybe some extra cash from a tenant will help." Rocko snapped his fingers. "I'll have to spruce it up a bit though, at least get some curtains and a mirror."

The doorbell rang. Rocko went back downstairs and opened the door to find Filburt standing there with a glove and bat.

"Hey Rocko, how about hitting a few homers at the park?" Filburt smiled.

"Can't right now, I have to figure out how to spruce up my spare bedroom." Rocko shook his head. "I'm going to rent it out to help pay the bills."

"Good idea." Filburt nodded. "Hey I can help, Paula and I have some leftover supplies from when we renovated our house."

After they got married they moved into Dr. Hutchinson's house (Widow Hutchinson moved out) and put Filburt's trailer in the garage to use for camping trips. Filburt also switched to calling Dr. Hutchinson Paula instead of Hutch since she only used her old last name for business now. She went by Filburt's last name for everything else.

"Great, let's go get then!" Rocko smiled.

They went back to Filburt's house and got the supplies. Paula, having returned from taking the kids for a walk, helped out as well. The kids were now four, and were close to Rocko and Heffer, but no more than Norbert who originally thought that Heffer and Rocko were his parents. Filburt and Paula set him straight when he was three.

They all returned to Rocko's house and spruced up the spare bedroom. Filburt cleaned, Paula put up wallpaper, and Rocko hung the curtains and mirror. Gilbert, Shellbert, Missy, and Norbert played with Spunky during that time. When they were done, Rocko wrote an ad for the newspaper to print. Hopefully, someone nice would respond and help him out with his financial problems.


	2. A Royal Curse

_On the other side of the planet, in a castle in Paris, France..._

Two poodle princesses were in their bedroom. The older one, Claire, was amber colored and wore a light blue nightgown. She was tall, but not too tall, she would only come up to Heffer's shoulder if she stood next to him. The younger one, Inez, was tan colored and wore light green pajamas. She was a head shorter than Claire. Claire was pacing in frustration while Inez watched from her bed.

"I have to do something, I can't wind up like our mother." Claire frowned.

"Well ze first thing you can do is stop pacing before you run a hole in ze carpet." Inez smirked. "Besides, I'm getting kinda dizzy."

"Oh, sorry." Claire stopped and plopped on her bed. "You can help me figure out a plan you know, zere's no way I'm marrying this Alexander jerk."

Alexander was a Doberman and Claire's forced fiance. You see Claire and Inez's family were under this curse: the oldest daughter would be forced to marry a jerk. It started centuries ago, when their ancestor was supposed to marry this noble foreign prince. Unfortunately, another foreign member of royalty, who was evil, killed him and forced the ancestor to marry him instead. Ever since then, the oldest princess would be given a jerk for a fiance by her father. And Claire had enough of this.

"Well why don't you just run away?" Inez shrugged. "If you leave tonight zere's a chance zey won't be able to track you down. Besides, maybe you can find help somewhere."

"Shoot, why didn't I think of that." Claire giggled. "Okay, but you're coming with me."

"Me?" Inez shot up.

"Well do you want to marry Alexander in my place?" Claire said with a knowing smile.

"Ew, no way! I'd rather marry Edgar." Inez winced; Edgar was obviously her boyfriend. "Okay you win, I'll come too. Where should we go?"

"I'm thinking Australia..."

"Uh-uh, too obvious."

"Oh right. Well, how about America?"

"Still obvious, but not as much, and more hiding places."

Claire and Inez got dressed and started packing. They left most of their royal items behind, but packed their crowns just in case. Claire wore a blue striped shirt with black pants and a blue beret, while Inez wore a red ruffled shirt and jeans. Claire also wore a heart shaped ruby locket, which she hid under her shirt. They snuck out the back way, and got a taxi to the royal bank where they got all their money out of their account. They then took the taxi to the airport where they got basic tickets to America, specifically the USA.

When they made it to the US it was tomorrow for O-Town. Claire and Inez exchanged their francs for dollars and then spent a week looking for places to live, but nothing caught their fancy. Then, in a cafe near a train station, Inez found something:

"'Wanted: a tenant for a spare bedroom in O-Town. Must be tidy and kind. Payment for the room will be negotiated, but tenant must pay for food by helping with chores. Call...'. Oo Claire, you'll love this." Inez grinned teasingly.

"What do you mean?" Claire cocked her head.

"The guy who owns ze spare bedroom is a wallaby." Inez continued grinning.

"A wallaby?"

"Yup, his name is Rocko Wallabee."

"Let's check that out!" Claire wagged her tail before heading for the train station.

Inez rolled her eyes in amusement and payed for their bagels and coffee before catching up. They took the train to O-Town, and then went to the address printed on the ad.


	3. Rocko's New Tenants

By the time they arrived it was late afternoon. They rang the doorbell.

"Coming!" Rocko called from the kitchen; he opened the door to find Claire and Inez.

Rocko was surprised, one of the last things he expected to find on his doorstep were two pretty girls.

"Are you Rocko Wallabee?" Claire asked.

"Uh...yes I am...can I help you?" Rocko almost blushed.

"Of course, we're here about ze spare bedroom you wrote about in you ad." Inez nodded, showing Rocko the ad.

Rocko was more than surprised now.

"Uh, of course, please come in." Rocko let them in and then led them upstairs to the bedroom.

Claire and Inez looked it over.

"What do you think sis?" Claire asked.

"I think it'll do great." Inez smiled, winking at Claire.

Claire just blushed, while Rocko watched the scene in confusion.

"Uh, may I help you unpack?" Rocko offered.

"No, zat's okay, we didn't pack much." Inez smiled.

"Okay..." Rocko started to walk away.

"Hang on, is everything okay?" Claire looked concerned.

"Yeah it's just...I expected an old maid or a college student to answer the ad, not two lovely ladies." Rocko blushed. "And...are those French accents?"

"Oui, we came here from France on a getaway." Inez smiled, flattered (Claire was even more flattered).

"Wow, I love France...or at least the genuine culture."

"Ah, you are not fond of Chokey Chicken taking over various landmarks are you?" Claire smiled. "Neither are we, but ze king had ze final say so."

"Really?" Rocko smiled. "Oh, I didn't catch your names."

Claire and Inez introduced themselves.

"Those are very nice names." Rocko smiled. "Now, about the payment..."

"Of course, will zis do?" Claire took some money out of her purse and gave it to Rocko.

Rocko dropped his mouth open upon seeing how much there was. In fact, he dropped it so low that it hit the ground.

"Two-hundred bucks?" He gasped. "Oh I'm sorry, but this is too much..."

"If it is by ze week then how about by ze month instead?" Inez suggested.

"Er, still too much..." Rocko rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.

"Okay, a hundred a month, but zat's our final offer." Claire winked.

Rocko blushed again.

"Okay, a hundred a month." He agreed.

"As for chores, we'll be happy to help." Inez smiled. "I don't mind cleaning and Claire here is a mean cook."

"Oh I'm not zat good." Claire waved a hand dismissively.

"I'm sure you'll be better than me at it." Rocko smiled.

"We'll see, I'm cooking dinner tonight."

"Great, I'll get the kitchen ready."

Claire and Inez unpacked while Rocko did a little cleaning. He and Inez then chatted on the couch while Claire cooked. Rocko and Inez liked each other right away, but Rocko felt something different for Claire. He just couldn't figure out what it was. After a little over an hour, a great smell wafted through the house.

"Dinner's ready!" Claire called.

Rocko and Inez went into the kitchen and saw a cooked chicken on the table. Rocko dropped his mouth open again, but not as much as last time.

"Your garlic lemon chicken with mushroom stuffing!" Inez said excitedly. "I've missed zat dish!"

"Well, I thought it would be ze perfect meal to test how good a cook I am." Claire smiled; she then caught Rocko's surprised look. "Oh, in case you're wondering I snuck out earlier and bought the ingredients. It's on me and don't argue."

"Oh." Rocko recovered and sat down; they started to eat. "Wow, this is the best meal I ever had!" Rocko smiled.

"Thanks, I'm glad you liked it." Claire smiled back.

The next morning, Rocko woke up, got dressed, and went downstairs. He smelled something good, sort of like pancakes.

"What's for breakfast?" Rocko asked, knowing that Claire was cooking in the kitchen again.

"Crepes." Inez smiled, having finished dusting.

They went into the kitchen and sure enough there was a pile of crepes on the table, with jam and jellies around it. The three of them ate heartily. Just then, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it." Rocko said, wiping his mouth and going to the door. "Oh, hi Heff."

"Hey Rocko, want to go to a movie or something? I'll pay." Heffer said.

"Hang on, let me ask Claire and Inez." Rocko went back to the kitchen.

"Who?" Heffer followed.

"My tenants." Rocko explained. "Claire, Inez, this is Heffer, one of my best friends. Heff, this is Claire and Inez, they moved here from France."

"Hello." Heffer smiled.

"Bonjour Heffer." Claire smile; then she looked at Inez and jabbed her in the arm.

"*Hmph!*" Inez protested, her mouth full; she quickly swallowed. "Sorry Claire but you know it's rude to speak with your mouth full. Hello Heffer."

"You have got to learn not to enjoy my cooking so much zat you keep ze food in your mouth for a long time." Claire smirked. "We overheard Heffer's invite and we'd love to come, but we're paying for our tickets."

"Of course." Rocko smiled.

"Okay." Heffer agreed.

They walked to the theater (Rocko was trying not to drive so much due to gas prices) and had a good time. On the way back they met up with Filburt and his family and more introductions were made.

"Say Rocko, how about we do some shopping while we're out?" Claire suggested. "I noticed you need more groceries, and we should get you a new TV as well."

"Well..." Rocko hesitated at first. "All right, but only the necessities."

"Go for the TV too Rocko, _The Fatheads_ are on tonight and your old TV might fizzle out on us again." Filburt reminded him.

"Oh right, thanks Filburt."

"You like _Ze Fatheads_ too?" Inez gasped. "Claire and I love zat show!"

"Really?" Filburt was surprised.

"Well in that case we can wait on the TV." Rocko smiled. "I've got another idea."

At that, Rocko took a quarter out of his pocket and called Ed and Bev Bighead on a pay phone. He told them about his new tenants, and how they love _The Fatheads_, and Bev said that they were more than welcome to come over and watch it. She double checked with Ed of course, who agreed. As much as Rocko and his friends annoyed Ed he never minded them coming over to watch _The Fatheads_. After all it was Rocko who brought their son back to them and Ed was grateful to him for that. When the conversation was done Rocko told everyone that they were going to watch the show at the Bigheads' place instead.

"Wait, Bighead...as in Ralph Bighead?" Claire said wide-eyed.

"Yes, his parents are Rocko's next door neighbors." Filburt explained.

"Zat is so cool!" Inez smiled excitedly.

Continuously chatting happily, they all went shopping. They got some more food, all paid by Claire and Inez. For the first time in months, Rocko was going to have lunch and Spunky was going to have a second meal. They went back to Rocko's place, put the groceries away, fed Spunky, and went over to the Bigheads'. They had a great time, and Claire and Inez were excited to meet the parents of Ralph Bighead. They also realized that they were the inspiration for _The Fatheads_. Ed and Bev didn't like it at first, until they realized that Ralph didn't mean any harm when he created the show. It was just his way of releasing his frustration, as well as a way of keeping his parents nearby without having to fight with Ed about being a cartoonist. He later added the character Rollo as a thank you to Rocko for bringing him and his parents back together. Rocko was at first hurt, until he realized that Ralph exaggerated everything in his show, and didn't think that way about Rocko at all (except for the being polite part).


	4. Rocko's Life Improves, But is in Danger

Weeks passed, and Rocko found his life to be better than ever before. Claire and Inez helped him shop for new appliances and furniture, took great care of his house and yard, and boy did Claire cook astounding dishes. People started treating him with more respect too, mostly because Claire and Inez were very attractive. A few guys tried flirting with them, but they were turned down. Inez still had her boyfriend in France, and Claire was slowly developing feelings for Rocko. She did have a soft spot for him for being a wallaby at first, but when she got to know his personality more she started liking him for that. Inez caught on right away, and kept trying to get Claire to admit her feelings, but Claire wasn't so sure that Rocko would return them. Inez, of course, thought she was being ridiculous.

One time they were hanging out at the park, and do you remember that large hippo with the deep voice named Gladys? Well, once again someone bumped into Rocko, this time a teenager playing Frisbee, and Rocko once again hit Gladys in the butt.

"How dare..." Gladys prepared to swat Rocko.

"You leave Rocko alone!" Claire snapped, stepping in. "It was an accident, someone bumped into Rocko causing him to bump into you!"

Gladys, embarrassed, peeled Rocko off her butt.

"Sorry, I didn't know." She said, this time in a kinder voice.

"Well now you do." Claire said, leaving with Rocko in a huff.

"Thank you Claire, I was getting tired of that." Rocko said.

"Zat's happened before?" Claire was surprised.

"More times than I'd like to count." Rocko muttered.

"You really haven't been getting ze respect you deserve have you?" Claire realized sympathetically.

"Not until you and Inez arrived." Rocko smiled. "You two have really made my life better, and for that I'm eternally grateful."

Claire smiled back with a slight blush.

About a month later, Rocko found Claire sitting on the couch and sadly looking at her ruby locket.

"Is there something wrong Claire?" Rocko asked, joining her.

"I'm just thinking of my poor many-great grandmother, Catherine." Claire sighed. "She was supposed to marry zis wonderful guy, a real prince, but he was murdered and ze murderer forced her to marry him instead."

"That's horrible." Rocko said sympathetically.

"And it's not ze worst part." Inez said, joining them with mugs of hot chocolate. "Our ancestors ever since zen have been cursed with horrible fiances. Claire was next in line."

"So that's why you two came here, you're running away from the curse." Rocko realized. "But in this modern age can't you have your own say in your marriage?"

"Not with our dad being a previous horrible fiance." Claire frowned. "Also...Rocko zere is something we've been keeping a secret from you."

"Hey whoa, I trust Rocko as much as you do but are you sure zis is...?" Inez cautioned.

"Inez, please, I-I have to tell him." Claire raised her hand; she then got up from the couch. "I'll be right back."

She went upstairs, and then came back down with something behind her back.

"Claire...before you say anything there's something I've been keeping a secret from you." Rocko said. "I was scared to tell you, but then I thought about the past and realized that I had to tell you."

"What is it?" Claire tilted her head a little.

"I..." Rocko gulped. "I love you."

Claire smiled one of her largest smiles. She then sat down and looked at Rocko lovingly.

"I love you too." She said.

Rocko couldn't believe it, but he decided to just accept his good fortune.

"Now, what did you want to tell me?" Rocko asked.

Claire took the crowns out from behind her back. Rocko gaped at them.

"The truth is Inez and I are princesses." Claire admitted. "When I said zat Catherine was supposed to marry a real prince, I meant it literally. Here's what he looks like."

Claire opened her locket, revealing a black and white photo of a handsome wallaby prince. Rocko paled and ran over to the closet upstairs. He came back down with a photo album.

"What's zat?" Inez asked.

"My family's photo album." Rocko explained, sitting back down; he then flipped through the pages. "There!" He pointed at a familiar photo.

"It's him!" Claire gasped as Inez dropped her mouth open. "Prince Caleb Pureabee! But why would his photo be in your family album, unless..." Claire froze.

"No way." Inez stared.

"Yes, he's my many-great granduncle." Rocko explained. "He had a younger sister who ran away after he was murdered. She was worried that she would be next so she left the royal life and married a commoner, and they became my many-great grandparents. After she ran away a cousin took over the throne."

"**You're** royalty?" Inez gasped.

"Yes, in a way." Rocko rubbed the back of his head. "But royalty in general is kinda extinct in Australia since it's now ruled by a government, it's been for a long time. So there's no chance of me getting back on the throne, so to speak."

"Rocko you are in grave danger." Claire paled. "If my forced fiance Alexander or our father found out about your heritage zey would kill you!"

"What?" Rocko squeaked, turning even paler than before.

"It's been said zat only a descendant of Prince Caleb can end our curse." Inez explained. "And since you're a descendant..."

"Oh dear." Rocko recovered. "Heritage Revealing Day is a very dangerous day." Rocko then remarked dryly; Claire and Inez giggled.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Considering their previous conversation, you couldn't blame Claire, Inez, or Rocko for zooming into the kitchen in fright. Another knock at the door.

"Excuse me, is there a Mr. Rocko Wallabee at this residence?" A voice from the other side of the door asked.

"Yes." Rocko said, nervously going up to the door. "Who's calling?"

"Messenger from Holl-O-wood." The voice said.

Rocko relaxed and opened the door. The messenger immediately handed Rocko an envelope.

"Thank you, here." Rocko gave the messenger a dollar.

"Thank you sir, good day." The messenger tipped his hat before leaving.

"G'day." Rocko said as he shut the door.

He opened the envelope to find an invitation to a party.

"Claire, Inez, it's from Ralph Bighead!" Rocko said excitedly. "He's having a birthday party at the studio and has invited me and five guests!"

Claire and Inez danced around cheering.

Later Ed and Bev showed up at the door, revealing that they too got invites. Originally Rocko, Claire, and Inez was going to be among their guests, but that plan changed when they found out that Rocko also got an invite. Rocko invited Claire and Inez of course, and later called Filburt and Heffer and invited them. That left one invite left, which Rocko decided to use for Paula Hutchinson. Ed and Bev invited various members of the family. Filburt and Paula were more than happy to come, and quickly got a babysitter for their kids. Heffer wasn't as into the show as Rocko or Filburt, but he could never say no to a party. Rocko called Ralph on the phone (he got his number back when they became friends) and RSVPed. Ralph was happy to hear that Rocko's tenants were also fans. Even though he got tired of being a cartoonist at one point, it turned out that it was just because he hit a rut. Later he got out of it and went back to enjoying his job. He told Rocko to have him and his guests meet at his parents house.


	5. The Party and Ambush

The night of the party, everyone found out why: Ralph sent them a limo! They went to the party, and had a great time. Claire and Inez got along with Ralph instantly. It at first seemed that Ralph was smitten with Inez, and invited her to dance.

"I'd love to dance, but just to let you know: I have a boyfriend back home." Inez smiled.

"Oh." Ralph was a little disappointed, but got over it. "Oh well."

"Want to dance Rocko?" Heffer asked.

"Uh, sorry Heff but...I was going to dance with Claire." Rocko said sheepishly.

"I'd love to." Claire smiled, taking Rocko's hand.

They went out onto the dance floor, leaving a sad Heffer behind. Later a slow dance came up and Claire and Rocko danced to that as well, making Heffer a little jealous. At one point during th party, Filburt questioned Rocko about his relationship with Claire. Rocko confirmed that he and Claire were now a couple. Heffer was even more jealous.

After the party, the limo took everyone home.

Unfortunately, as they were on a mountain road, something started shooting at the limo! The sound of a tire popping was heard and the limo started to skid along the road. Fortunately the limo stopped without tipping over or going off the road. Everyone became confused and scared...except for Claire and Inez, they were just scared. Inez immediately looked out the window and saw something.

"It's Alexander!" She gasped.

Claire and Rocko paled. The others were still confused because they didn't know the truth about Claire and Inez being princesses.

"Rocko, you have to hide!" Claire said.

"What? But what about you?" Rocko argued.

"Alexander won't hurt me or Inez, but if he sees you he'll kill you just for being a wallaby! My dad warned him about wallabies!"

At that, Claire lifted a seat cushion, revealing that the seat was hollow. They found out earlier when they were talking to Ralph at the party, he explained that that was for hiding from his fans whenever he went outside the studio. Now Claire was using it to hide Rocko from Alexander.

"Rocko, no matter what happens do not come out!" Claire ordered fearfully as she forced him into the seat.

"But..." Rocko protested, only for Claire to cover him with the seat cushion.

Inside the seat, Rocko couldn't hear anything at first. Then he heard the sound of glass smashing, and realized that Alexander must have broken though the window. He then heard hissing, and something started to seep into the seat. He slowly became sleepy.

"Sleeping gas." He said to himself. "No...I have to fight it...Claire..."

He fell asleep. After what felt like hours, he woke up but couldn't hear anything. He took a chance and glanced out. Claire and Inez had disappeared, but his friends and Bev and Ed and their family were still there, unconscious. Obviously they were still feeling the affect of the sleeping gas.

"Guys! Heff? Filburt? Mr. And Mrs. Bighead? Come on everyone wake up!" Rocko said, climbing out of the seat and lightly slapping them in the face.

Filburt, Paula, and the Bighead family woke up first. Heffer was still out of it. In fact he was snoring.

"Heff? Come on Heffer this is no time to sleep!" Rocko shook Heffer by the overall straps.

"Let me Rocko." Filburt said; Rocko backed away and let Filburt near Heffer. "HEFFER YOU MORON WAKE UP!" Filburt yelled into Heffer's ear; Heffer screamed in terror.

"Geez., what was the big idea? I was having a lovely dream." Heffer protested, annoyed.

"Sorry Heff but this is an emergency, Alexander has kidnapped Claire and Inez!" Rocko said.

"Who the heck is Alexander?" Filburt asked.

Rocko told everyone the truth. Boy did they drop their mouths open.

"You mean you're descended from royalty?" Paula was surprised.

"Yes, I never told anyone because it doesn't matter now, Australia is now run by a government." Rocko explained. "Listen, Claire needs saving from the wedding!"

"Count me out." Ed muttered. "I didn't sign up for this."

"Ed!" Bev scolded. "If Rocko needs help then..."

"No, everyone stays here. I'm going alone." Rocko shook his head.

Everyone stared at him.

"Hold on Rocko, you know what will happen if this Alexander guy finds out who you are..." Heffer said worriedly.

"I know, Claire already warned me about that." Rocko said solemnly. "But it's my duty, as Prince Caleb's descendent. I need to avenge his death and save Claire from her family curse. Besides...I love her."

Filburt smiled.

"Well, at least let me come along."

"Filburt, darling..." Paula said concernedly.

"I know you don't want me harmed but I'm not letting Rocko face the battle alone." Filburt crossed his arms.

Paula smiled proudly.

"Okay turtledove." She said. "I'd come too but our children will need me to comfort them while you're away. 'Kay?"

"It's perfectly okay." Filburt smiled.

"Come on then, we're going to the airport." Rocko started to leave the limo.

"Hold on you guys, I'm coming too." Heffer got up.

"Thanks Heff." Rocko smiled. "Mrs. Bighead, can you look after Spunky for me while I'm gone?"

"Of course Rocko dear, I'd be glad too." Bev smiled.

"Mr. Bighead, let Ralph know what's going on for me will you?"

"Okay." Ed looked emotionless but deep down he was slightly concerned.


	6. A Rescue Trio

Rocko, Heffer, and Filburt left the limo and walked down the road until they got into town, and then got a taxi to the airport. They bought tickets for Paris and flew there. By the time they arrived, it was afternoon. They tried getting a ride to the palace, but it was off limits for tourists, so they went to a car lot to rent one. They then got a map and figured out how to get to the palace.

"But how can we get there in time to stop the wedding?" Filburt asked.

"Well, there's always the desperate solution..." Rocko hesitated.

Filburt turned towards the car, where Heffer was pretending to be a race car driver. Fortunately Filburt had the keys and the engine was turned off, but Filburt, realizing what Rocko was hinting at, became nervous anyway.

"Oh no, no way! You remember what happened back when Heffer flew that ice cream plane! We could've died!" Filburt waved his hands rapidly.

"Filburt I know it's a bad idea but letting Claire marry Alexander is a worse idea." Rocko pleaded.

Filburt groaned.

"I know I'm going to regret this." Fliburt muttered, handing Rocko the keys.

"Hey Heff," Rocko said as he and Filburt got into the car. "How about you drive?"

"Really Rocko?" Heffer was surprised.

"Sure, you're the fastest driver here." Rocko shrugged, although he was a little nervous.

Filburt almost covered himself in seat belts.

"All right!" Heffer swiped the keys and turned on the car.

Rocko grabbed a seat belt from Filburt and put it on.

"Oh fishsticks." Filburt said nervously.

A.N. Don't ask me how the car happened to have more than two seat belts in the back, I haven't figured it out either. Then again, a lot of things happen in that world that can never be explained.

Heffer started to drive normally at first, but then his daydream of being a race car driver clicked back on and he started to speed. Soon, they were speeding so much that they scared the other drivers, and even the pedestrians! Heffer was shouting driving noises and laughing crazily, and Rocko was screaming in terror.

"I'm nauseous, I'm nauseous..." Filburt said.

Heffer drove the car off a freeway!

"I'M REALLY NAUSEOUS!" Filburt panicked.

Fortunately, they landed without any damage, unless you count the emotional damage. Heffer continued driving rapidly and crazily until the reached the palace. The guards at the gate tried to signal for a stop, but Heffer was still in his daydream and didn't see them so he crashed through the gate. They then continued on, Rocko and Filburt screaming, until the car finally smashed onto the stairs leading up to the front door. Filburt pulled a paper bag out of nowhere and started breathing into it, while Rocko was frozen with terror. Heffer was still making driving noises. Rocko managed to snap out of it and leapt out of the car.

"Wait for me." Filburt said quickly, obviously wanting to get away from Heffer.

"No, you stay here and snap Heffer out of his road madness, I'm going to stop the wedding." Rocko shook his head determinedly.

"Why do I always get the worse jobs?" Filburt muttered as Rocko went up the stairs.

Rocko burst through the doors, causing everyone inside to turn around. Quite a few feet in front of him was Claire, being forced down the hallway by her father, a tan dog of an unknown breed wearing a king's robe and crown. A few feet beyond that was a Doberman, who Rocko guessed was Alexander.

"Rocko!" Claire gasped.

"A wallaby!" The king gasped.

"I'll got him." Alexander unsheathed his sword and ran towards Rocko.

"No!" Claire protested, tripping him.

Rocko took that moment to pull a sword out of a suit of armor nearby.

"You leave Claire alone, I won't let you force her into this!" Rocko glared.

"You stay out of this wallaby, this does not concern you." Alexander glared back, getting up.

"Actually it does, in fact it has concerned my family for generations."

"Rocko no, what are you doing?" Claire protested.

"Finishing something my ancestor should have finished." Rocko said determinedly. "One thing you obviously didn't know about Prince Caleb: he had a sister!"

"You mean you're..." The king was shocked. "Kill him!"

"With pleasure!" Alexander growled.

"Rocko!" Claire cried.

Alexander tried to strike Rocko, but Rocko blocked him. They began fighting, Rocko even surprising himself. He had never held a sword before and yet he was doing a good job sword fighting. During the battle, Filburt had finally managed to snap Heffer out of it and they entered the palace. They watched the battle with horror.


	7. An Unexpected Visitor and Gifts

Alexander, being larger, suddenly pushed Rocko aside, knocking his sword into the wall! Claire broke free of her father and tried to stop Alexander from slicing Rocko through the chest by going in between them. It worked, but broke off her locket in the process. The locket fell to the ground at Rocko's feet.

"What is that?" The king glared.

"A family heirloom." Inez frowned at him. "The photo of Princess Catherine's true love."

Alexander tried to smash the locket, but Rocko grabbed it and ducked. Unexpectedly, the locket burst open and a poof of smoke appeared! The smoke formed a shape in front of Rocko...THE SHAPE OF PRINCE CALEB! He was taller than Rocko, about as tall as Inez. I can't tell you the colors, since he was a ghost and so didn't have any, but the sword he carried on his belt glowed even brighter than him for some reason...

Everyone gasped, and started to back away except for Rocko, Claire, and Inez. Claire and Inez went closer, not believing their eyes, while Rocko was metaphorically glued where he was.

"Many-great granduncle!" Rocko stared.

"Skip the 'many-great', it makes me feel ancient." Prince Caleb chuckled. "So, this is my descendant, I was waiting for one to finally end the curse."

"You were in ze locket ze whole time?" Claire stared.

"Yes, to keep an eye on dear Catherine's descendants." Prince Caleb looked mournful. "I miss her so much, but I was not going to let history repeat itself either. You must be one of her descendants, but I should have known earlier. You have her beauty."

Claire blushed happily.

"So, descendant, what's your name?" Caleb smiled.

"R-Rocko." Rocko was still staring at him.

"Rocko, my grandnephew." Caleb smiled proudly. "Life for you is going to become grander than you could have ever imagined. But it won't happen until after you defeat this scoundrel, and that's where I come in."

He unsheathed his sword and handed it to Rocko.

"Take it Rocko, this is your family heirloom." Caleb said. "My dear sister had this buried with me so that I may give it to my heir, and you are him."

"Heir?" Rocko was confused. "Uh, Australia is ruled by a government now..."

"Not that heir." Caleb chuckled. "You see I was more than a prince, I was also a hero. You are now to take my place as a hero, and defeat evil wherever it may lie. This is your first mission."

Rocko nervously took the sword. It immediately stopped being a ghost sword and became a real one. It was a beautiful silver color with opals and pearls in the hilt. Rocko, to his surprise, found the sword to be lighter than the one he previously grabbed.

"A hero...was that why I was able to sword fight easily earlier?" Rocko asked.

"Partly, it's also because it's a talent of mine that you inherited." Caleb smiled. "I will stay off to the side, this is your battle now."

At that, Caleb flew up towards the wall and sat on a window ledge. Alexander, recovering, approached Rocko, preparing his sword again. This time Rocko was more ready, and fought back even better than before. The battle continued so fiercely that most of the crowd actually forgot about Caleb, who wanted it that way. His time was long over, it was now Rocko's turn to shine.

Alexander knocked Rocko down again, and raised his sword to kill Rocko. Rocko raised his sword, intending to block Alexander's strike, but raised it higher than he meant and struck Alexander through the chest. Alexander gasped with surprise and pain, and made a final attempt to kill Rocko. Rocko moved away, causing Alexander's sword to get his shoulder instead of his heart. Alexander backed away, and fell to the ground dead. Rocko was at first shocked that he killed him, but then recovered, remembering that Caleb had said that he was meant to defeat evil. Obviously the only way to stop evil is to kill it. Rocko got up and dropped his sword, relieved that it was over.

But it wasn't, because the king rushed forward with his own sword raised, preparing to kill Rocko! But, to everyone's shock, the chandelier above them fell on the king. A trickle of blood flowed from the chandelier, proving him to be dead. Everyone turned to where the rope for the chandelier originated, and saw an older amber colored poodle standing there. Obviously this was Claire and Inez's mother the queen. Now it was over.

"Oh sure, **now** you stand up against our tyrant of a father." Inez rolled her eyes.

The rest of the crowd chuckled while the queen rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. Claire didn't chuckle, but that was only because she was more concerned about Rocko.

"Rocko, darling, are you all right?" Claire asked, going over to him and kneeling so that they were looking at each other eye-to-eye.

"I am now...oh, you mean my shoulder." Rocko chuckled. "Yeah, I'll be fine, just need a couple of stitches-"

Claire kissed him. Rocko was at first wide-eyed, especially because it was his first real kiss, but then his eyes became hearts and he returned the kiss. Filburt smiled happily, but Heffer looked really sad. Caleb floated back down to the ground.

"Way to go Rocko, I'm real proud of you." Caleb smiled.

Rocko and Claire broke the kiss, and Rocko went over to Caleb.

"I couldn't have done it without you." Rocko smiled back. "I guess now you can finally rest in piece?"

"Yes, but there are a couple of things I need to do first."

At that, Caleb placed a hand over Rocko's heart. A glow shone from his hand and entered Rocko's body. Rocko felt warm, and the pain from his shoulder disappeared. This was because the glow spread to his wound and healed it!

"Wow, thank you." Rocko smiled.

"Don't thank me yet." Caleb winked.

Rocko frowned in confusion. Suddenly, his whole body glowed! Everyone else stared, not knowing what to do or think. When the glow vanished, everyone was shocked. Rocko was now the same size as Caleb! Don't worry, his shirt had gotten longer and he was now wearing pants.

"You can thank me now." Caleb chuckled.

"I'm...I'm taller..." Rocko couldn't believe it.

"Yes, originally you were supposed to be that height but something stunted your growth when you were younger." Caleb smiled. "It's now time you were your true height. But no matter what size you are, it will have no relation towards the size of your heart, which is one of the biggest ever to exist. I must go now."

"Good-bye granduncle, and thank you." Rocko smiled.

"You're welcome." Caleb said before turning to Claire. "I'll tell Catherine that you said hi."

Claire waved as Caleb floated towards the ceiling. He slowly started to disappear, until he was gone. Claire and Rocko hugged.


	8. Rocko's True Love

"You know, you can become royalty again." Claire smiled.

"I can? How?" Rocko asked.

"How do you think? By ruling France with me." Claire giggled.

Rocko looked further down the hallway, down to where two thrones stood side by side. He then turned towards Filburt and Heffer, who looked both happy and unhappy.

"Claire, I can't." Rocko shook his head. "America is my home now."

Filburt and Heffer were at first surprised, but then smiled with relief.

"Zen I'll come with you." Claire decided.

"You will? I mean...I didn't even..." Rocko stammered, realizing he didn't have a ring on him or anything.

"I don't care, you're my true love no matter what." Claire affectionately put a hand to his cheek.

Rocko felt his heart beat faster than it ever had before. It even beat faster than it used to beat for Melba Toast, his old crush.

"You really think so?" Rocko couldn't believe his luck.

"I know so." Claire gazed into his eyes. "My love for you is stronger zan any other love I possess. So, Rocko, I know you may not be as sure as I am, but when we return to America will you marry me?"

If Melba Toast had said that to Rocko years ago he would have said yes right away. Of course there was no way that would ever happen, she already married her boyfriend a long time ago. As for this case, Rocko wanted to say yes but also didn't want to make a mistake, as he had made several mistakes many times before. But, when he looked into her eyes, he felt an overwhelming sensation of love, one that was so strong that his heart made him say these words:

"Of course I will."

They kissed again. Everyone except for Heffer cheered.

"Inez," Claire smiled to her sister after she and Rocko broke free. "It looks like you and Edgar will be taking over ze kingdom now."

"Wha-me and...?" Inez blushed.

"Inez."

Inez turned towards a handsome French frog. This frog didn't wear the usual striped shirt and beret like most of the other French frogs. Instead he wore a tuxedo and had a pencil-thin mustache.

"Edgar!" Inez hugged him.

"Inez, I was going to ask you to marry me a long time ago, but you and Claire left for America so fast zat I never got ze chance." Edgar smiled, pulling out an engagement ring box.

"I'm so sorry Edgar, I would have contacted you but..." Inez started to apologize.

"No, it is perfectly all right." Edgar smiled. "I understand what you were doing and I admire your bravery and loyalty to your sister. Plus, I completely understand your unwillingness to marry zat Alexander jerk in your sister's place."

Inez smiled.

"Of course I will marry you."

They kissed, and when they broke apart Inez saw Claire grinning.

"Hey...you knew all along!" Inez accused, amused and annoyed.

"Well, Edgar needed my help picking out ze ring." Claire chuckled. "Hey come on, did you want me to spoil ze surprise?"

"Well of course not but you sneaky...wonderful sister!" Inez hugged Claire. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too, but we'll visit each other often." Claire hugged Inez back.

"Of course we will." Rocko agreed; Edgar nodded.

Claire then said her good-byes to her mother. Rocko thanked her for saving him from the king, and she thanked him for saving Claire from Alexander. Claire followed Rocko, Filburt, and Heffer out of the castle. This time they took the palace's plane back to America. Obviously Claire and Inez didn't use it when they ran away because it would have been too easy to trace.

Back in America, Rocko sent a letter to his parents and younger sister, telling them the good news.

One day, during the preparations, Rocko caught Heffer looking at him and Claire longingly. He and Claire were sitting on a park bench going over the floral arrangements.

"I'll be right back Claire." Rocko said, getting up; Claire nodded, also seeing Heffer.

"Heffer what's wrong?" Rocko asked as he neared Heffer.

"That's what I was wondering: what's wrong with me?" Heffer asked.

"Oh come on Heff you were luckier in the love department than I was." Rocko scratched his head, not knowing what he was getting at.

"Not as lucky as I wanted to be." Heffer looked at Rocko lustfully.

Now Rocko got it.

"Nothing is wrong with you Heff, it's just that I'm not gay." Rocko said sympathetically. "I'm not even bi. I'm full time straight, girls only."

"Oh." Heffer sighed.

"Hey, don't worry, you'll find someone." Rocko smiled.

"I guess." Heffer started to walk away.

"Hey, you want to be my best man?" Rocko asked.

Heffer turned around, looking better.

"Sure."

Rocko's family and everyone else Rocko knew on relatively friendly terms, were invited to the wedding. Claire's family came too, along with Edgar, but they were the only ones on her side of the altar. Claire and Inez's father forbid them from making friends when they were little, obviously fearing that Claire might elope before he could marry her off, so their only friends were Rocko and his friends.

The wedding went without a hitch, Heffer decided to let his friend have his happy ending and so didn't object. Rocko and Claire went to Australia for their honeymoon so that Claire could see Rocko's hometown.

Rocko did become a hero, by ending the curse he gave Edgar, the true king of France, the opportunity to get rid of all those Chokey Chicken restaurants. He only kept one in the shopping district for those who grew attached to the chain. As time went by Rocko stopped other hostile takeovers as well, but mostly enjoyed his new life with his true love Claire. Later, his life grew better, for he became a father. He and Claire had a son named Jordan. Jordan looked like his father but had his mother's ears and hair, and he too would eventually become a hero. Rocko was never happier, no longer was his life modern. Now, it was wonderful.


End file.
